What is it with parents round here – Am sure they have some sort of disease. I think I will call it ‘Gollumitis’.
The silent cries of ‘my precious’ as they say goodbye to said prodigal child at school gate. Hands almost stretched out, not quite wanting to part with their 'babies'.
Give me strength!
They then stand for 20 minutes dissecting and bitching about every other female not in their 'clique'.
Then once home it's the slow countdown to 2.45pm when they rush back up to school to go pick up said Messiah to take home, feed – on lo-fat/hi energy/wa wa beans or similiar thingamys and then it's off to brownies/dancing/ballet/gymnastics/music lessons/horse-riding/horse aerobics (what the...) and anything else they can ram into their kids’ lives to make them so accomplished. Don't they feel so smug when ‘poo poo’ can do the inverted splits whilst holding a toggle on their nose.
However, in the process, all these extra-curricular activites are turning their child into a spoilt, evil little shit in the meantime.
Yup Gollumitis. Great name. Shall patent it. Damn it – someone beat me to it.
Tolkien had no idea.
